It’s the first thing people see when searching profiles, and can be the make-or-break decision in less than five seconds of someone knowing of your existence. Your first picture is the most important piece of the profile puzzle. Your second and third photos should be flattering, and one of the three should be a full body shot, because there’s no point in dealing with the embarrassment of finding out one of you even accidentally misrepresented what you look like in person.” Do you have one friend? Do you or they have a camera or a camera phone? Usually a face shot with good lighting, no bathroom shots, or self shots if you can help it. I personally will click on a profile only if there is a reasonable chance that they’re attractive, and I do this for 3 reasons: 1 is to save time, 2 is because it’s a dating site and I’m only going to consider someone I find attractive, and 3 is because I don’t want to unnecessarily give the message that I may be interested (by showing up in their visitor list) if I’m definitely not. Picking an odd, silly, weird, or goofy picture is probably not the best choice. #3) Reddit’s OkCupid Profile Photo Adviceįrom our very own /u/mattheikkila’s OKCuTips: “Your first photo should either show how attractive you can be, or be interesting enough to compel those you’re interested in to click on it when it’s a little 60×60 pixel thumbnail. (For those that don’t know, negging is the practice of offering a backhanded compliment through a method of a borderline insult, or “Low-grade insults meant to undermine the self-confidence of another individual so they might be more vulnerable to your advances and seek your approval.”) Speak in slang, memes, ol’ timey, or anything that isn’t who you are.Be afraid to ask me out during our first or second message.Invest too heavily in a profile or message.Let the conversation flow and ask new questions in a lull. Open all possible topics of conversation or ask lots of questions in one question.Mention how attractive you think he/she is in an opening message.Spend a bunch of time to introduce yourself, tell your life story, or explain why you don’t think the person will message you back.Send any kind of first message that you wouldn’t feel comfortable saying to someone in public.Say “why don’t you have a BF/GF? You’re too attractive to be single.”.For the love of all that is wonderful in this world, please put forth some effort if you’re trying to find someone to be with. u/Lachryman says, “ I say ‘Hey’ to my coworkers every morning. Write just “hi, hello, hey there, etc.” and expect to get a response.If nothing interests you personally, let it go. Don’t ask someone about his/her interest in a topic just because (s)he’s cute. Only initiate conversations you WANT to have.Don’t write anything that sounds too obvious or stupid. Don’t write anything you wouldn’t say to their face. Imagine yourself talking to this person in real life.Use correct spelling, grammar and punctuation.If not, dive a bit deeper into a topic they probably get quite often. Attempt to ask a question they haven’t heard before. ![]() Demonstrate that you’ve read their profile.Show interest in getting to know them vs.Be aware that you’re not the only message in their inbox, and lengthy messages can get skimmed or skipped. This is important because the introduction is visible before the message is even opened. Be interesting in the first 100 characters.#2) Reddit’s OkCupid First Message Advice Nobody wants to be around a stuck up little brat.ĭon’t write out your whole goddamned life story. You probably don’t want to be lumped in with lots of people.ĭon’t portray negativity or entitlement! This is supposed to be the hook to your profile and coming off as either of those will turn away tons of viewers. Lots of people dislike trying to summarize their complicated personality into a couple of paragraphs in a way they’re comfortable with. What is it these things are supposed to tell us about your character?ĭon’t say you suck at self-summaries. The things you /like/ and the things you /do/ belong in other sections. Use the freestyle nature of this section to fill in anything you feel you didn’t get the chance to say in the rest of your profile.ĭo focus on who you /are/. #1) Reddit’s OkCupid Self-Summary Adviceĭo try writing this section last. Here’s what believe to be the top 3 best-of-the-best advice from Reddit OkCupid. The OkCupid Reddit wiki tries to capture the best of these questions and answers but can be a bit unweildly itself. And the same questions come up over and over again. Since the subreddit has existed, however, tons of ground has been covered. Reddit (especially r/okcupid) is a great resource if you’re looking for a sounding board, feedback, or advice around dating on OkCupid.
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